by Captain Oblivious
Summer is on it’s way out. I hope that this fall’s lineup of features can help out the moviegoer like me that was a bit disappointed by the meager offerings by the studios this summer. It should be clear to everyone which movie has my full attention but there is plenty besides “the boy who lived” to get me ready to go to the theater. Let’s take a look.
– Machete (Sept. 3)
Robert Rodriguez brings his Grindhouse trailer to feature film length. You got Steven Segal cutting off people’s heads, Danny Trejo using intestines as safety cord and that acting piece of cardboard Lindsey Lohan in a three-way. Never let it be said that Rodriguez doesn’t know how the shoot for his target audience.
– Resident Evil: Afterlife (Sept. 10)
Milla Jovovich is taking time off from psycho-analyzing aliens to get with the zombie crowd again. The fourth film in the series (yep fourth) has her, Ali Larter and Wentworth Miller going after the heart of the Umbrella Corporation, Albert Wesker.
– Devil (Sept. 17)
M Night Shyamalan produces this thriller/horror flick about five strangers trapped in a high rise elevator and one of them just may be the prince of darkness. Hey sounds better than The Happening 2.
– Legend of the Guardians (Sept. 24)
Before Zack Snyder unleashes Sucker Punch on us next year he is offering up this animated tale of a young owl that must save his home from an evil force called the Pure Ones by journeying out to find a legendary group of owls.
-Let Me In (Oct. 1)
Cloverfield director Matt Reeves remakes the quickly becoming classic Swedish film Let The Right One In. A boy develops a quick friendship with a new girl in town but soon discovers that she is not what everyone thinks she is. Don’t let the fact that this is a vampire tale shy you away from seeing this. Twilight is Twilight most everything else is ok.
– The Social Network (Oct.1)
Jesse Eisenberg plays Facebook creator Mark Zuckerburg as his little college creation quickly balloons into a multi-billion dollar monster.
-Jackass 3D (Oct.15)
It’s Jackass. It’s 3D. Call me immature but I will be there.
– RED (Oct. 15)
Warren Ellis’ comic comes to life with a cast one could only dream of. Bruce Willis, Helen Mirren, Morgan Freeman and John Malkovich play an ex-CIA operative team that has to reform when an assassin comes a knocking.
– Paranormal Activity 2 (Oct.22)
The first one had the best viral campaign in the history of movies turning a 15,000 dollar movie into a 100 million dollar hit. Now that the newness has worn off can they keep audiences excited?
– SAW 3D (Oct. 29)
The seventh and supposedly final entry goes full 3D and returns Cary Elwes as Dr. Gordon from the first flick. Yes I am one of those people who like the overall story arc in the Saw movies so I will be seeing how it ends (if it is indeed the final one).
– Megamind (Nov. 5)
Will Ferrell, Brad Pitt and Tina Fey voice this animated film about the worlds greatest villain who after defeating his greatest rival must find a new purpose after accidentally creating the world’s newest villain.
– Due Date (Nov. 5)
Todd Phillips follow-up to The Hangover stars Robert Downey Jr. as a man trying to get to the birth of his first child while having to deal with his new running mate played by Zack Galifianakis. A Planes, Trains and Automobiles vibe is around this movie. And that’s not a bad thing.
– Unstoppable (Nov. 12)
Denzel Washington and Chris Pine star as train conductors who have to find a way to stop a train with chemical tankers that is on collision course with a small town. This movie is riding the fine line of fun and hokey so we’ll see which side it ends up on.
– Tangled (Nov. 12)
Disney retells the story of Rapunzel with a bit of a twist. She falls for a bandit called Flynn Rider who accidentally finds his way into her secret tower.
– Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1 (Nov. 19)
The end begins here. After almost ten years the Harry Potter movie franchise begins it’s swan song. Harry, Ron and Hermione begin their quest to find the remainder of Voldemort’s horcruxes. The first movie should be a little slow moving as was the first part of the book all leading to the final massive battle in the second. Hard to believe Harry Potter fans that it is almost time to say goodbye. First the books, now this.
– Red Dawn (Nov. 24)
Thor fights Russians. A bit simplistic I know but that seemed the easiest way to describe it. Chris Hemsworth leads the Wolverines against the America-invading commies.
-The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader (Dec. 10)
Disney may have dropped the franchise but Fox is hoping to capitalize by releasing the third film in the series. Edmund and Lucy return to Narnia with cousin Eustace and join Caspian aboard the Dawn Treader to help the new king find the seven lost Lords of Narnia.
– Tron: Legacy (Dec. 17)
Disney has been showing footage and hyping this movie for almost two years so this thing better live up to it. Jeff Bridges returns to dude it up in the world of light cycles again this time with his son and Olivia Wilde.
– Yogi Bear (Dec. 17)
Dan Akroyd and Justin Timberlake voice the classic characters who get the real world treatment. Jellystone is being closed down and only Yogi and Boo Boo can save the only home they have known.
Little Fockers (Dec. 22)
Ben Stiller and Robert DeNiro return to continue their family feud only this time involving kids.
– Gulliver’s Travels (Dec. 22)
Jack Black stars in this updated version of the classic story. This could easily be fun to watch or a steaming pile. We will just have to wait and see.
– True Grit (Dec. 25)
Leave it to the Coen brothers to have the balls to redo the movie that John Wayne won and Academy Award for. Jeff Bridges takes over the role of Rooster Cogburn who helps a young girl find the man responsible for her father’s death.